Unthinkable Cramps | Ria.Weirdo Love

There’s one hillside in Unthinkable Cramps. There could be more, but everyone stopped counting after one. It’s a great spot to go for peace and quiet. To contemplate the deep mysteries of life. To stop and smell the roses. The perfect place for a first date. And Ria and Disgusting are falling head over heelsContinue reading “Unthinkable Cramps | Ria.Weirdo Love”

Unthinkable Cramps | Special Announcements!

It’s the new sensation and it’s coming to your door. Who’s door? Burnin’ Willie’s door. It’s only your door if you’re Burnin’ Willie or the person planning on murdering him and living in his house aka his murderer. The only thing hotter in Unthinkable Cramps than Burnin’ Willie are the sounds from indie rockers, SoulContinue reading “Unthinkable Cramps | Special Announcements!”

Unthinkable Cramps | Nova Olsen’s New Findings

/ Previously in Unthinkable Cramps / Mac is gripping the papers so tightly they begin to tear. His eyes as wide as oceans as he watches Nova run to the corner of the room and bounce off adjacent walls making her way up to the ceiling. She braces herself at the top and pushes inContinue reading “Unthinkable Cramps | Nova Olsen’s New Findings”

Unthinkable Cramps | Murky, Sanchez and Soul Pods

Murky leaps over the pile of bones and dashes out the back of the restaurant. He looks left and right for Donny and his mother. Then up and down. He sees a bird squawking in a tree and shoots it. He catches a whiff of meatballs and murder in the air and runs to theContinue reading “Unthinkable Cramps | Murky, Sanchez and Soul Pods”

Unthinkable Cramps | Diane & Sheila.Droning So Hard

Diane and Sheila are perched on the roof, the sun reflecting off their tinfoil hats. Sheila watches nervously as Diane navigates a drone over the neighbor’s house.Diane: Why are these things so hard to fly?Sheila: Keep it steady.Diane: I’m trying.Sheila: Make it go in the backyard.Diane flies the drone over the fence and watches theContinue reading “Unthinkable Cramps | Diane & Sheila.Droning So Hard”

Unthinkable Cramps | Sasha n Yoyo.Riding That Train

Yoyo’s face blurs like a static tv station as she rides the poisonous horse into the sunset. Its hooves kicking up loose gravel as they close in on the locomotive. Sasha reaches out her old man arm and pulls herself into a train car. The horse spits venom at her boots and melts her laces.Sasha:Continue reading “Unthinkable Cramps | Sasha n Yoyo.Riding That Train”

Cure For The Summer Camp Blues

I chug the sands of time from the hourglass and cough up a crystal ball. One of the few tricks I’ve learned here at summer camp. It’s the only thing that calms me during my panic attacks. Another instance of the signals from my heart and brain crashing into each other from across the room.Continue reading “Cure For The Summer Camp Blues”

Unthinkable Cramps | Ria and Cat

Ria sleeps as though dead in her dinosaur onesie. A cat with old, gray fur prances into her yurt and scratches at the straw mat. It awakens Ria from extinction.Ria: When did we get cats? This place is turning into a real circus.Ria sneezes as the cat rubs against her face. She reaches for aContinue reading “Unthinkable Cramps | Ria and Cat”